Food For Thought

Voice of Recovery from Addiction 

Food for thought…...

Have you ever went out and told yourself, “I’m only gonna have a few then head home.” Then before you know it, you’re closing the bar, you’re broke and your three sheets to the wind….and you do this more often than not? Have you ever “toyed” with the idea that you may have a drinking problem but shut it off in your head because you’re too prideful to admit it and seek help?   Have you ever woke up after a morning or days of partying and thought to yourself, “Why am I doing this? I don’t even have fun anymore but I can’t stop!”  Have you tried switching what you drink in the hopes that you won’t continue falling flat on your face?  Example, you switch from whiskey to beer because whiskey makes you mean, yet you consume an extreme amount and suffer from the same hangovers and have the same problems.  Maybe you wake up in the morning with the shakes until you get that first drink in you.  Are your family and friends slowly separating themselves from you after you’ve been drinking?  Most importantly,  are you so far gone that you honestly believe that you are the ONLY person in the world who feels the way you do????? I got news for you….You’re NOT alone and you CAN’T achieve true sobriety alone.  Your pride, your ego and your fears will do nothing but help you sink lower and lower.  Maybe your problem isn’t booze, but it IS drugs….the end result is still the same no matter what your addiction is.  You hear of people hitting some serious “Rock bottoms” like loosing everything they have before they finally admit they have a problem.  Then you compare yourself to them….I’m not “that” kind of drunk.   I still have my home, my wife, my job etc…..but at the same time you’re drinking more than your weight on a regular basis.  Hell, I compared myself to my brother all the time.  He was what seemed to be a helpless alcoholic that drank vodka first thing in the morning and got the shakes when he didn’t.  No, I wasn’t “that” kind of drunk, but I WAS a drunk and had to finally admit it in the end if I wanted to live beyond the age of 40.

 

Asking for or seeking help does not make you weak, in fact, when it comes to recovery, it’s the ONLY way you can gain strength.  Chances are, everyone in your life already knows of your problem….we usually are the last ones to see it, so what do you have to be embarrassed about?  Maybe you think that if you can’t drink and party anymore, your life will be completely boring…..Ask yourself and answer the following questions:
1 Where is the fun in getting so wasted that you have to be carried out of a club, bar or home and you have no memory the next morning?

2 Where is the fun in projectile vomiting and finding yourself wrapped around a toilet bowl?

3 Where is the fun in making a complete ass out of yourself, loosing your self respect and dignity ?
After you’ve answered those questions, think about this for a moment…….IF YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKED UP TO HAVE A GOOD TIME, THAN YOU MAY WANT TO ASK YOURSELF WHY THAT IS.

 

For an insane amount of years (we’re talkin’ decades here…..) I couldn’t imagine my life without alcohol or drugs.  Now I can’t imagine my life with them in it.  When you get sober, truly sober…not dry you gain true freedom.  You don’t instantly turn into an old maid or an old man.  There IS life after booze…In fact, there is a much better life.   A life you will remember, you will appreciate and a live you will come to love living.  Even with the bumps in the road I have encountered over the last four years, my life has been so much better than it was back then.  My life is now manageable and peaceful.  I wouldn’t trade what I have today for all the money and Jack Daniel’s in the world.

August 29, 2014
AJ Menendez

 

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